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The Need to Connect


We are social creatures. As humans, we need to connect with others to not only survive but thrive. We are living in the midst of unimaginable uncertainty. We could be defining a new normal, one that is different from what we have known.  We all know our ability to connect in ways that have been meaningful to us have changed.  I (Paula), didn’t really realize how much this impacted me.

On a Bad Day

On a good day, when I am being intentional, I recognize that building new muscles and choosing my mindset is crucial to my survival and vital for me (actually all of us) to thrive. 

But on a bad day? On a day when I was feeling the loss of connecting with people outside of my home. A day when I was overwhelmed by our governor’s mandatory ‘Stay In Place’ order. A day when it was cloudy, cold and rainy.  The only way I can describe it is to say that I was lost. I was scared, and I was sad. 

Intuitively I knew I had to stop the downward spiral, but I wasn’t sure how. I would love to report that I had a brilliant insight in that moment, but that’s not true, I was just desperate. I asked for help. 

Insights are Brain Tools

I found the courage to talk out loud about my fear.  By the way, this was hard even for a professional coach!  My insight came during that crucial conversation. I felt the power of release as I talked through what was on my mind. 

My insight reminded me that connection matters. That we actually need each other to survive. That as our habits/routines are forced to change, we CAN find new ways to connect. My insight is: Together we are Better.  With this insight, I started exploring new ways to connect.  I chose a new path to go down versus the one I had been on.  I’m not sure I would have done that without this insight (or at least not as soon as I did).

Insights expose new connections our brain is making.  Sometimes when we have an insight, it feels like an ‘aha’ moment.  In that moment, our brain has found a new path – a path that means something real and relevant to us.  Whether it’s obvious to someone else doesn’t matter.  In that moment, it is a new neural connection for us as individuals.  That moment can be a tool if we decide to use it.

New insights can come in so many ways:  reflecting, conversation, reading an article…finding the courage to share what is on our mind. What insights have you experienced lately? How are you utilizing them as new tools?

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